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Seeing Clearly Now
Our 8-year-old got her first pair of glasses this week.
It was awesome and, for me, a little bit heartbreaking.
She kept telling me all that she can now see — the grass isn’t a fuzzy blanket, there is a girl’s image on the Wendy’s sign, and hey, there are words on that thing hanging over the sink.
My first pair of glasses sat on my nose at the age of 5, and by 8, I was wearing them all the time. Same age as Maria.
Of course, Maria is happy and she looks so cute and so smart in her frames. And, I am elated that such as thing as spectacles exist so that my daughter can see.
But, it is killing me. And, I have to let it go.
You see, I hated wearing glasses. Maybe my daughter won’t. No se.
But, my memories of glasses are these: They bounced on my nose during P.E. and it made me dislike gym class even more. Some of my glasses were so thick and so big (thank you 1980s fashion…) that they cut into my fat cheeks. And oh, how I didn’t like the rain flicking them or the Miami humidity fogging them up.
I got contacts at 12. My mom said that if Amy Carter could wear contacts, so could I. And so, I and easily wore lenses until I was 24, but when I moved to Nashville, allergies killed me and made contacts impossible to withstand. My vanity was sacrificed. I spent the remainder of my 20s in glasses, during a time I was supposed to be all hot and fabulous. Few people can be hot and fabulous in glasses, OK?
LASIK changed my life at 32. A few months after surgery, I snorkeled the Great Barrier Reef in Queensland, Australia and in my head, over and over, I chanted “Thank You, God, Thank You, Doctor Ming Wang, Thank You, God, Thank You, Doctor Ming Wang….” over and over and over again. As nearsighted as I had been, I never would have been able to see the miraculous wonder that is that reef. (I was way hotter in my 30s, thankyouverymuch.)
Now, at nearly 45, I have two pairs of glasses again because the vieja eyes are starting. I need them to drive at night and see my computer monitor…and my iPhone and books and magazines.
I imagine my brain, which works in vision, is wondering que carajo is going on with the eyeballs in my head — they’re good, they’re bad, good, badish.
So, I’m keeping my dislike for being a girl in glasses to myself because I have to. My girl doesn’t need my baggage and bottom line, seeing her see clearly is what it’s all about.
But, right now, I’m thinking of shredding that 6th grade picture of me with the huge aviator-shaped glasses with the rose-colored lenses. The pimple on my chin didn’t help, either.
So cute!! My son has been wearing glasses since he was just 2! he had surgery at one. He feels like his glasses are a part of him so don’t worry. Your daughter will be fine. And hurray, she can now see clearly!! Btw, I started wearing glasses at age 11. I wear them to drive, most of the time.
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Indeed, she will be fine! Just as all of us are — despite the hangups of our parents!
Your story brought back my own eyeglass angst. I started wearing glasses in the third grade, and by the time I was in the sixth grade, I was rocking Elton-John-huge, pink-tinted peepers. My mom gave me the green light for contacts in the 7th grade. I loved your anecdote about the Great Barrier Reef! I hope someday to muster up the courage for Lasik surgery.
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If you do get Lasik, be sure to go to the very best doc in your area, not the cheapest, the very, very best! No bargain shopping. I have heard nightmares and my own doctor was the person who fixed the mistakes other doctors made.
Good luck!
She doesn’t have to hate them. Now people who don’t even need glasses are wearing them with clear lenses just to get that geek chic look.
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I keep thinking Diane Keaton … I know you are right and hence, keeping my opinion to myself.
She is a cutie! Iv’e never seen you in glasses but I’m sure you pull off one hot fabulous chick easily.
My husband got surgery and says that was the best thing he ever did for himself.
My 11 year old is eventually going to need glasses, according to the doctor, just a matter a time….
Yup, they told us when she was 5, she would eventually need them…and here we are.
Lasik is life-changing! Glad your husband had a good experience, too.
I’ve had glasses since around 3rd grade and “accidentally” threw them away on my lunch tray at school.
Those glasses were replaced several times over the years but I’ve never worn them with any regularity. My 33rd birthday is this month and I’ve been getting a lot of headaches. I’m suspicious that it’s my vision which is getting worse after staring at the computer screen all day. I tried on my most recent pair of glasses and they make everything look so weird. The eye doctor said they’re the right prescription so I don’t know what to make of it. I can’t get used to them.
Anyhow - my older son wears glasses and doesn’t have any angst about it. Our younger son is supposed to get an eye exam and will probably need them too. He doesn’t seem upset about the possibility.
Sometimes it’s best to keep our personal feelings and memories to ourselves so we don’t taint our kids’ views. (Like the other day my younger son asked me if I agreed that math is fun. I told him ‘yes’ even though I hate math. Why ruin it for him and cause him the years of homework struggles I dealt with?)
Maria is a cutie, glasses or no glasses - and you’re right to focus on the positive. How fortunate we are to be able to fix our children’s vision when there are people in the world that can’t.
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Amen to being able to fix it..and hurrah for keeping our own angst to ourselves…and goodness, I would have killed you if you were my kid! LOL Throwing your glasses out?
My Mom didn’t find out it was on purpose until years later. Likewise she didn’t find out until years later that my first son wasn’t an accident but rather a plot to ensure I could marry Carlos.
She hasn’t killed me only because she’s hoping one of my kids will turn out like me - for her, that will be the sweetest revenge jajaja
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Great post! Brought back memories of when I first wore glasses in 6th grade. I remember walking around “el bloque” with my mom and realizing that those green rectangles were street signs! And I also remember the annoying rain beating against them. Thank goodness that I got contacts in 8th grade. However, it’s nice to know that glasses nowadays are very chic looking (not the thick monstrosities of back them. Can you say pocket calculator? : ) and you’re daughter is a cutie. She will make wearing glasses cool : )
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